I made it through an entire New Years party without exposing my dick to anyone. So that's an improvement on Halloween.

Generally I don't do resolutions, but this year I'm gonna try to quit cigarettes and caffeine. I figure with all the money I save, I'll be able to afford a mild cocaine addiction. That sounds more satisfying than cancer sticks and coffee.

Ren, I showed you the tony hawk rides a hover board viedo

I didn't sleep at all on New Year's Eve and then fell out of a window the next day. Luckily for our hero, it wasn't high up.

I guess my resolution is to focus on my responsibilites more.

That's a very vague resolution. Are you keeping it vague so you don't actually have to change? Because that's the lazy way. That's the American way.

America rocks!

My resolution is to increase my fiber intake so I can have more worthwhile shits

That's lovely! I'm glad your taking your diet more seriously this year.

My New Years resolution is to watch the entire series of Dark Shadows.

Sounds like a plan! I've been watching it for years now and I'm still not even close to finishing it.