Apr '20 *
So, am I to understand that Terminator: Genisys is no longer a thing? No longer a consideration within the Terminator universe, I mean. The thought of another sequel coming along and erasing Genisys always sounded reasonable to me, but in this case, maybe not...? If not merely a fitting finale, Dark Fate was always an opportunity to get the T-train back on the tracks, which, even originally, seemed very unlikely for many reasons. However, after watching Terminator: Dark Fate, I'm afraid we've now strayed further than ever. Well, sort of. As usual, it's complicated
Yep, Genisys never happened. Neither did Salvation. And the machines have yet to rise. However, Judgement Day is still around. They're letting us keep that one, along with the original, of course. But back to T2. The events from that movie happened as we remember them, but it's what happened shortly thereafter which changed everything we are familiar with. After Skynet's existence was literally wiped out in T2, it somehow continued sending back Terminators to take out John. And you know what? One finally got him. In a scene filled with CGI goodness, we witness something that looks almost like a cut scene from T2. We see what appears to be young Linda Hamilton watching in Horror as young Edward Furlong is blown away by a T-800, who looks kind of like Arnold, but, of course, is not. So, Skynet is gone, John Connor is gone, and... Alright, then. Great start!
Fast forward to present day Mexico, and we got a familiar series of events with two naked Terminators showing up from the future. One good, one bad. The bad one is something called a Rev-9. Those things are like T-1000's if they were made of tar instead of that cool, silvery liquid stuff. This thing is proven to be a bad sonofabitch pretty early on. Far more advanced and dangerous than the T-1000, actually. As it would turn out, the good one isn't really a Terminator at all. Grace is some type of cyborg-human hybrid. The third time they've attempted this in the series, and coincidentally, the third time they've also attempted a female Terminator. That is, if you count the TV show. Who do they want to kill/protect? Who the hell is left? Well, some chick, apparently. The Rev-9 nearly ends some chick and her brother, but Grace comes in at the last second and takes down the Rev-9 because she's a girl and girls can do that... If they choose to, I mean. They don't have to!
Taken down but not out, the Rev-9 recovers in record time. Some chick's brother gets taken out pretty quick, but he's a guy, so, no loss there. Grace and some chick come pretty close, themselves, but are saved by none other than Sarah Connor, who is, once again, being portrayed by Linda Hamilton. A very prepared Sarah just about blows that Rev-9 thing to hell, but only weakens it enough for everyone to get away. After getting ditched, Sarah catches back up with the girls and soon learns a few things: First and foremost, Skynet is indeed gone. Sarah and her son really were successful, which is really confusing, because what's with non-existent Skynet sending back more T-800's from a non-existent future? I'd really like someone to explain that to me how that works. Anyway, Grace has no idea what the grumpy old lady is going on about. Sarah learns that some other AI system will eventually be developed, which gives way to a similar Judgement Day, eventually giving way to a similar resistance. However, it's totally different because it's not called "Skynet". It's called "Legion". And as it would turn out, Legion is not after some "new John Connor" that some chick will give birth to ... Wait for it... Some chick is the actual target! So, shame on all you sexists who assumed that the only thing special about some chick was her uterus.
So, why is Linda Hamilton in this, again? Her character is more or less an obsolete relic from an obsolete reality that can't decide if it exists or not. Just hanging around, making snarky remarks. At least that hasn't changed since Genisys. Sarah makes mention that Terminators, yes, Skynet's Terminators, never stopped being sent into the past. Sarah reveals getting a "heads up" via text from an unknown source every time this happened, giving her the upper hand and making it possible to take out every one. Same story with the Rev-9, which is highly unusual. This unknown source, who Grace has also been instructed to seek assistance from, turns out to be none other than that same T-800 that killed John over 20 years ago. His name is Carl, and he's got a wife and step-son, and somewhat of a personality. And you know what else? He gets it. He gets what he did to John was a dick move. Carl gets that this hurt Sarah, and he's genuinely sorry. Carl wants to make things right, as he's been trying for years. Sarah says "fuck off, Carl". However, he's too valuable of an ally at this point, so, Carl sticks around to help Grace and some chick figure things out while Sarah pouts over her dead son. And after being portrayed as naive and unprepared for her fate the entire movie, some chick then suddenly snaps out of it. Some chick is now the warrior she was always destined to become, taking charge, getting everyone in the zone for one final battle with the Rev-9. Because sometimes chicks can do that.
What is it going to take for someone to finally take this franchise fucking forward? This isn't normal! Salvation sucked, but at least it kept the story going, as opposed to running around in circles like Genisys and Dark Fate. Just remake the original already and get it overwith, you assholes! Why put this once great franchise through all this? You can't add all this remakey shit and still keep the old stuff around. It makes no sense, even for a time travel movie. And I thought Genisys was pretty bad, but looking back... Yeah, ok. Pretty bad! Yet, as far as Terminator sequels go, I can deal with Genisys a little better. Genisys is almost like hanging out with an old friend you haven't seen in forever. You realize you missed old friend more than you thought, which gives you a warm, fuzzy feeling, even though they've clearly changed some. Dark Fate is like a new friend you don't know very well, but they have qualities which you find appealing and familiar. You don't fully trust new friend, but still have a blast hanging out with them. Those two films CAN be seen as similar in a way. Both have a bit of a "what if" thing going on, much like a fan film. Genisys implies alternate timelines, where as Dark Fate almost seems like that's what they were going for, but I don't think they were. It's hard to tell exactly what they were trying to do here. Personally, I find it all more enjoyable to pretend this is just another timeline.
Before I lay into this movie some more, I do want to point out that I really did enjoy it. Terminator: Dark Fate is a crazy, fast-paced action flick that turns out to be a lot of fun, though a lot to take in, at times. They came up with some pretty cool stuff for the Rev-9, building it up as a far bigger threat than any Terminator before it, even though it was technically not a Terminator, because that's a Skynet thing. And Grace wasn't such a bad character. Not annoying at all, actually. I think they got the human-Terminator hybrid down nicely this time. And ultimately, this IS a Terminator movie, so, I can't not love it. However, it all turns out to be a hollow, meaningless experience, mostly due to lazy writing and atrocious continuity.
An entry which not only strays further from the tracks, but goes the extra mile, destroying said tracks and building entirely new ones in the exact same spot for no real reason. All the while pretending to be a fresh take on the whole thing. It's only fresh or different on the surface. Legion IS Skynet and some chick IS John Connor. However, they don't go by those names, so, it's hard to get as invested in this as one could be. They really dropped the ball, excluding John Connor simply because he didn't fit into the "girl power" narrative they were obviously going for. It does seem like appealing to the woke crowd and turning this into a "feminist circle jerk" was a far bigger priority than making it the respectable follow up it was promised to be. And this could easily be the final installment, making it all the more unfortunate. But I suppose it's far more important to prove to the world, once again, that girls can do anything boys can do. Even be John Connor! 5/10
So, am I to understand that Terminator: Genisys is no longer a thing? No longer a consideration within the Terminator universe, I mean. The thought of another sequel coming along and erasing Genisys always sounded reasonable to me, but in this case, maybe not...? If not merely a fitting finale, Dark Fate was always an opportunity to get the T-train back on the tracks, which, even originally, seemed very unlikely for many reasons. However, after watching Terminator: Dark Fate, I'm afraid we've now strayed further than ever. Well, sort of. As usual, it's complicated
Yep, Genisys never happened. Neither did Salvation. And the machines have yet to rise. However, Judgement Day is still around. They're letting us keep that one, along with the original, of course. But back to T2. The events from that movie happened as we remember them, but it's what happened shortly thereafter which changed everything we are familiar with. After Skynet's existence was literally wiped out in T2, it somehow continued sending back Terminators to take out John. And you know what? One finally got him. In a scene filled with CGI goodness, we witness something that looks almost like a cut scene from T2. We see what appears to be young Linda Hamilton watching in Horror as young Edward Furlong is blown away by a T-800, who looks kind of like Arnold, but, of course, is not. So, Skynet is gone, John Connor is gone, and... Alright, then. Great start! Fast forward to present day Mexico, and we got a familiar series of events with two naked Terminators showing up from the future. One good, one bad. The bad one is something called a Rev-9. Those things are like T-1000's if they were made of tar instead of that cool, silvery liquid stuff. This thing is proven to be a bad sonofabitch pretty early on. Far more advanced and dangerous than the T-1000, actually. As it would turn out, the good one isn't really a Terminator at all. Grace is some type of cyborg-human hybrid. The third time they've attempted this in the series, and coincidentally, the third time they've also attempted a female Terminator. That is, if you count the TV show. Who do they want to kill/protect? Who the hell is left? Well, some chick, apparently. The Rev-9 nearly ends some chick and her brother, but Grace comes in at the last second and takes down the Rev-9 because she's a girl and girls can do that... If they choose to, I mean. They don't have to! Taken down but not out, the Rev-9 recovers in record time. Some chick's brother gets taken out pretty quick, but he's a guy, so, no loss there. Grace and some chick come pretty close, themselves, but are saved by none other than Sarah Connor, who is, once again, being portrayed by Linda Hamilton. A very prepared Sarah just about blows that Rev-9 thing to hell, but only weakens it enough for everyone to get away. After getting ditched, Sarah catches back up with the girls and soon learns a few things: First and foremost, Skynet is indeed gone. Sarah and her son really were successful, which is really confusing, because what's with non-existent Skynet sending back more T-800's from a non-existent future? I'd really like someone to explain that to me how that works. Anyway, Grace has no idea what the grumpy old lady is going on about. Sarah learns that some other AI system will eventually be developed, which gives way to a similar Judgement Day, eventually giving way to a similar resistance. However, it's totally different because it's not called "Skynet". It's called "Legion". And as it would turn out, Legion is not after some "new John Connor" that some chick will give birth to ... Wait for it... Some chick is the actual target! So, shame on all you sexists who assumed that the only thing special about some chick was her uterus. So, why is Linda Hamilton in this, again? Her character is more or less an obsolete relic from an obsolete reality that can't decide if it exists or not. Just hanging around, making snarky remarks. At least that hasn't changed since Genisys. Sarah makes mention that Terminators, yes, Skynet's Terminators, never stopped being sent into the past. Sarah reveals getting a "heads up" via text from an unknown source every time this happened, giving her the upper hand and making it possible to take out every one. Same story with the Rev-9, which is highly unusual. This unknown source, who Grace has also been instructed to seek assistance from, turns out to be none other than that same T-800 that killed John over 20 years ago. His name is Carl, and he's got a wife and step-son, and somewhat of a personality. And you know what else? He gets it. He gets what he did to John was a dick move. Carl gets that this hurt Sarah, and he's genuinely sorry. Carl wants to make things right, as he's been trying for years. Sarah says "fuck off, Carl". However, he's too valuable of an ally at this point, so, Carl sticks around to help Grace and some chick figure things out while Sarah pouts over her dead son. And after being portrayed as naive and unprepared for her fate the entire movie, some chick then suddenly snaps out of it. Some chick is now the warrior she was always destined to become, taking charge, getting everyone in the zone for one final battle with the Rev-9. Because sometimes chicks can do that. What is it going to take for someone to finally take this franchise fucking forward? This isn't normal! Salvation sucked, but at least it kept the story going, as opposed to running around in circles like Genisys and Dark Fate. Just remake the original already and get it overwith, you assholes! Why put this once great franchise through all this? You can't add all this remakey shit and still keep the old stuff around. It makes no sense, even for a time travel movie. And I thought Genisys was pretty bad, but looking back... Yeah, ok. Pretty bad! Yet, as far as Terminator sequels go, I can deal with Genisys a little better. Genisys is almost like hanging out with an old friend you haven't seen in forever. You realize you missed old friend more than you thought, which gives you a warm, fuzzy feeling, even though they've clearly changed some. Dark Fate is like a new friend you don't know very well, but they have qualities which you find appealing and familiar. You don't fully trust new friend, but still have a blast hanging out with them. Those two films CAN be seen as similar in a way. Both have a bit of a "what if" thing going on, much like a fan film. Genisys implies alternate timelines, where as Dark Fate almost seems like that's what they were going for, but I don't think they were. It's hard to tell exactly what they were trying to do here. Personally, I find it all more enjoyable to pretend this is just another timeline. Before I lay into this movie some more, I do want to point out that I really did enjoy it. Terminator: Dark Fate is a crazy, fast-paced action flick that turns out to be a lot of fun, though a lot to take in, at times. They came up with some pretty cool stuff for the Rev-9, building it up as a far bigger threat than any Terminator before it, even though it was technically not a Terminator, because that's a Skynet thing. And Grace wasn't such a bad character. Not annoying at all, actually. I think they got the human-Terminator hybrid down nicely this time. And ultimately, this IS a Terminator movie, so, I can't not love it. However, it all turns out to be a hollow, meaningless experience, mostly due to lazy writing and atrocious continuity.An entry which not only strays further from the tracks, but goes the extra mile, destroying said tracks and building entirely new ones in the exact same spot for no real reason. All the while pretending to be a fresh take on the whole thing. It's only fresh or different on the surface. Legion IS Skynet and some chick IS John Connor. However, they don't go by those names, so, it's hard to get as invested in this as one could be. They really dropped the ball, excluding John Connor simply because he didn't fit into the "girl power" narrative they were obviously going for. It does seem like appealing to the woke crowd and turning this into a "feminist circle jerk" was a far bigger priority than making it the respectable follow up it was promised to be. And this could easily be the final installment, making it all the more unfortunate. But I suppose it's far more important to prove to the world, once again, that girls can do anything boys can do. Even be John Connor! 5/10
They never specified how many, which means that there could be more model 101's wandering around to leave it open for Arnold to be yet another appropriately aged T-800 in a later entry, should they have the balls to do that, which is unlikely considering that girls don't have balls.
I'm on the same boat as you. I love it because it's a Terminator movie, but it's just another goddamn rehash which tells the same story yet again. There's so much potential for new direction, and while Salvation did indeed suck, it at least tried something different.
Some call this "Woke Fate" because it's racially diverse and gender-centric. Our man Arnold does a great job as always, but he's still reduced to comic relief so our other characters can be better than him. Perhaps my biggest beef is this supposed return to form wasn't nearly as dark and brutal as I wanted an R-rated Terminator movie to be. Nobody gets punched through the gut, and no machines perform surgery on themselves. People don't get stabbed through the mouth or the eyeball. There's barely any blood in this whole movie, for fuck's sake. Just because you kill off a kid in the beginning doesn't mean you're hardcore. It only means that Edward Furlong is too fat.