Because I mean hello, there has to be one at a place called trash epics. Troma made some SOV threads singling out a few particular movies, but I figured one big fat free-for-all post that either celebrates or lambasts this supremely niche sub-genre of bottom-feeding white trash horror deck would be appropriate.

I myself love these movies. I can't quite put my finger on why, since, in some cases, even on an entertainment level (we already know on a technical level this is about as bad as it gets) they can be pretty boring. Maybe what appeals to me most is that aesthetically, these movies are ugly. They remind me of the old home videos my parents took when camcorders were becoming readily available and more common back in the '80s.

Something about cheap video quality just appeals to me; the documentary-like look, weird and dated "state of the art" computer effects, the faint buzzing sound in the background, and to say nothing of chintzy homemade gore fx, bad synth scores, everyday, average people who ordinarily would never be in a movie otherwise (hello: old aunt in Splatter Farm), and the decorum of people's homes where many of these movies would solely take place, looking as plain and brown and depressing as can be, wood-panelled walls, linoleum flooring and all. There ain't no fancy schmancy set dressers here! Porn-staches and tube socks also need apply.

My whole life I've naturally flocked toward all things retro and outdated and simple. I don't like big expensive productions. I like amateurism, mistakes, and things that are corny or trashy. I may seem like a walking contradiction typing all this on my cellular telephone, and hey, that's OK. Where am I going with this? I dunno. I think I lost my train of thought a bit. Oh yeah, SOV! Talk about it here if you'd like.

I think my favorite SOV might be Sledgehammer. There's something strangely wrong with this movie. It sorta seems to take place in its own little world where, while Halloween and Friday the 13th are the film's obvious influences, somewhere along the way things went seriously astray. It walks a fine line between total garbage and surrealist arthouse horror. The scenes where the hulking beast of a killer can barely stand up straight without hitting his head on the ceiling in the director's real apartment, stalking his victims down narrow, sad little hallways that seemingly stretch on forever, is the stuff of nightmares.

I showed my girlfriend a few clips of Black Devil Doll from Hell and she thinks it's hilarious, but sitting down to watch the movie in its entirety isn't really worth it. Every now and then we like to go, "Biiiiiitch" and "Wake up, bitch! Wake up!" because it's just the best, you know.

Anyway, imma stop now, because my fingers are tired from typing.